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Multiple Sclerosis in Men - Part 2

Did you reach Multiple Sclerosis in Men Part 2 first and want to go to Part 1? Click here.

• What types of issues do men deal with, in terms of MS?
• What kinds of things do men who have MS worry about most? 
• Because multiple sclerosis in men usually affects you when you are a young adult, you may have been right in the middle of building a career or raising a family. 
• How do you continue to provide for your family if you're unsure about being able to continue working a full-time job?
• How can you help raise your children if you suffer from fatigue or disability and can't walk without help?
• What type of future can you look forward to if you can no longer work and are forced to be on Social Security Disability Insurance?

Multiple Sclerosis in Men: 
The Unique Struggles Men Face

I hear you. Living with MS comes with challenges that many don’t fully understand, and as a man, you might be carrying the weight of expectations—whether from yourself, society, or the people who depend on you. It’s tough navigating a disease that disrupts your plans, shakes your sense of independence, and forces you to rethink the future you had envisioned for yourself. Let's delve a little into each of these talking points. 

What types of issues do men deal with in terms of MS?

MS doesn’t just affect your body—it can impact your confidence, your relationships, and your sense of purpose. You might be dealing with physical symptoms like fatigue, muscle weakness, mobility issues, or chronic pain, but there’s also the emotional toll.

Many men struggle with the loss of control that comes with MS, especially if they’ve always been the ones who provide, protect, or take charge. You may have to learn to give up a little of that control in order to move on.

What kinds of things do men who have MS worry about most?

The worries can feel endless. How will this disease progress? Will I still be able to support my family? Can I maintain my career? What happens if I lose my independence? These thoughts can take up a lot of mental space, and it’s completely normal to feel anxious about what’s ahead.

MS Often Hits in Young Adulthood—Interrupting Your Career and Family Life

You might have been right in the middle of building a career or raising a family when MS entered your life. That timing makes everything harder—it’s not just about you. It’s also about your spouse, your kids, and your responsibilities. You wonder if you can keep up, if your plans have to change, or if people will see you differently. You may think you will be more of a burden than a help.

How Do You Keep Providing for Your Family When Work Feels Uncertain?

One of the biggest concerns is financial stability. If MS is making it difficult to keep up with a full-time job, what happens next? Some men manage by switching to remote work or jobs with more flexibility. Others explore disability benefits or financial assistance. It’s a tough transition, but finding ways to adapt can help take the pressure off both physically and mentally.

How Can You Be the Dad You Want to Be When Fatigue and Mobility Issues Get in the Way?

Raising kids is hard enough without the added challenge of physical limitations. MS might make playing with your kids, running around outside, or keeping up with their energy feel impossible on some days. But being a great dad isn’t just about physical activity. It’s about showing up, being present, and finding new ways to connect. Even if MS changes what you do with your kids, it doesn’t change the role you play in their lives.

What Does the Future Look Like If Work Becomes Impossible and SSDI Becomes the Reality?

Thinking about life on Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI) can feel unsettling. No one plans for that outcome and accepting it can be difficult for some. But the truth is, your value isn’t defined by your ability to work.

It’s about the relationships you build, the strength you show, and the life you continue to create in spite of MS. The future might look different, but that doesn’t mean it’s any less meaningful.

I know that facing these questions can be overwhelming, but you’re not alone. You’re still the same person you’ve always been—just navigating life in a new way. If you want to talk more about strategies for adapting, finding support, or making sure MS doesn’t define your life, check with your healthcare provider about referring you to a therapist if necessary.

More issues of multiple sclerosis in men

The following questions deal with even tougher conversations as far as multiple sclerosis in men. And they aren’t the easiest to talk about—but they do matter. MS can bring challenges that affect your confidence, relationships, and how you see yourself, and it's okay to acknowledge that.

You May Worry About How You’ll Satisfy Your Spouse or Partner Sexually When Things Just Don’t Work

Intimacy is deeply personal, and when MS starts interfering—whether it’s fatigue, nerve dysfunction, or changes in libido—it can feel like a loss. Maybe you worry about how your partner sees you, or whether things will ever feel "normal" again.

Here’s the truth: intimacy isn’t just about sex. Emotional closeness, communication, and adapting together can create a fulfilling relationship even when physical challenges arise.

Talking openly with your partner about how you’re feeling—not just physically, but emotionally—can strengthen your bond. And if needed, there are medical options, therapies, and adjustments that can help, so don’t hesitate to seek support from your healthcare provider.

How Do You Deal With Depression?

Living with MS isn’t just a physical battle—it’s a mental one. Depression can creep in when plans change, abilities shift, and uncertainty builds. Some days, it’s hard to stay motivated, and it might feel like no one truly understands what you’re going through.

The most important thing? You are not alone in this. Finding ways to manage depression—whether through therapy, medication, staying active, or connecting with support groups—can make a huge difference. Your emotions are valid, and there’s nothing weak about asking for help.

Or Feelings of Inadequacy and Low Self-Worth?

MS can make you question yourself. Maybe you feel like you’re not the same man you used to be, or that you’re letting others down. But MS does not define you.

Your worth isn’t tied to how much you can do physically, how hard you work, or whether you need help with things you once did easily. You’re still you. You still bring value, wisdom, love, and presence into your relationships and your world.

Finding ways to reframe your perspective—focusing on what you can do rather than what you’ve lost—can help you rebuild your self-confidence.

At the end of the day, MS can challenge you, but it doesn’t take away your strength, your importance, or your ability to live a full, meaningful life. If you ever need strategies for navigating these feelings, I’m here to help.

Everything we've talked about so far are all legitimate concerns for men who have been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. Each one can cause added stress, which in turn can lead to increased relapses or exacerbations and even more mobility problems.

How does all of this affect you emotionally?

• Anxiety? 
• Isolation? 
• Frustration? 
• Anger?

These emotions can feel overwhelming, and when you're dealing with MS, they can hit even harder. Just remember, emotions are meant to be felt and not covered up. You're not alone in this.

Anxiety

• MS brings a lot of unknowns, and that uncertainty can make your mind race. You might worry about your health, your ability to work, your family’s future—things that used to feel solid now seem unpredictable. Anxiety makes it hard to focus, hard to rest, hard to just be present. But you don’t have to carry it alone. Finding ways to ground yourself, whether through talking it out, breathing exercises, or even medication, can help keep it from taking over.

Isolation

• Feeling cut off from others is tough. Maybe your friends don’t fully understand what you’re going through, or you’ve had to cut back on social activities because of fatigue or mobility issues. Isolation isn’t just about being alone—it’s about feeling disconnected as well. But connection doesn’t have to disappear. Lean on those who truly get it, whether it’s family, support groups, or online communities. You deserve to have people in your life who will listen. People who show up and who remind you that you matter.

Frustration

• Some days, MS makes things harder than they should be—your body doesn’t cooperate, plans change, and simple tasks can turn into battles. It’s okay to be frustrated. It’s okay to acknowledge that this isn’t fair. But frustration needs an outlet—whether it’s exercise, journaling, venting to someone who understands, or finding ways to adapt and work around obstacles, you deserve relief. Don’t let frustration trap you in a cycle of resentment.

Anger

• MS isn’t something you asked for, and sometimes that anger can build up. Maybe you feel angry at your body, at the situation, at how much your life has changed. Anger can be exhausting, but it’s also valid. The key is figuring out how to process it without letting it consume you or make you lash out at those around you. Whether it’s finding productive ways to channel it, working with a therapist, or simply giving yourself permission to feel it—anger doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you care.

You're dealing with a lot, and none of it is easy. But you're not defined by these emotions—you’re just navigating something really challenging, and that takes strength.

Seek help when you need it

As a man, it may be difficult to ask for help. Hopefully, you have a strong support group in place when it comes to your family, friends, and your health care team. This can help you deal with everything that's happening in your life. But only if you are able to talk to them about what's bothering you. 

It may be very difficult for you to deal with the fact that you have MS. And even more difficult to talk about the things you have lost as a result of it. Don't be afraid or embarrassed to seek help. 

Remember, you are not alone

Throughout the years, Cir has sought counseling for depression and other past emotional issues. The longer he has MS, the easier it is for him to see that this is a good thing. And necessary when he can't work it out on his own.

A chronic disease is one that you will live with for many years of your life. Day in and day out there is something going on - whether it's the symptoms, the emotional or cognitive issues, or the abilities that you have lost or that have been limited. Admit it. That can be very hard to do - if you try to go it alone.

Realize that you don't have to do this alone. There are so many people out there who are willing to help. If you aren't surrounded by family or friends, find some. Especially those who are in similar situations.

I know it sounds a little funny, but it will help when you have people in your life who understand and can help you. And your health care team is a good place to start.

Talk to them - each and every one of your doctors. Learn, learn, learn. Find out everything you can about this condition. In a way, that will help take away the "power" from your MS and give it back to you. You take the lead. Remain in the driver's seat. You can beat this.

Learn about the disease and what you can possibly expect. Remaining (or becoming) as healthy as you can by continuing to exercise and eating foods that are good for your brain and your body are some of the first steps you can take.

Taking an active role in managing your symptoms is another way of staying on top of any issues that might come up. This includes dealing with things like depression, cognitive issues, as well as sexual, bowel, and bladder problems, as soon as they arise.

What about your dreams - your future?

When one set of dreams is taken away, build new ones. Then figure out what you can do to make them come true. Do you have any hobbies that can be transformed into a business? Do you know something well that you can teach others? This goes for men as well as women.

If you hadn't noticed, this website is a culmination of what we know about living with MS as a couple. We built it together and now it is not just a website, but an online business. And we live on Cir's SSDI (Social Security Disability Insurance). It is possible to re-invent yourself – man or woman – even as you live your life with multiple sclerosis.

Go from Multiple Sclerosis in Men Part 2 back to back to Part 1. And here's another perspective when it comes to multiple sclerosis in men. (Link will open in a new window).

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